Coffee...

If you know me at all, you probably know one of my biggest downfalls is being a control freak. I like to think I have improved but I still find myself getting anxious or uncomfortable with things that are beyond my control. Three weeks ago tomorrow I decided I wanted to quit drinking coffee when my dentist informed me that it would discolor my teeth. (Duh, one of those things I knew but I guess I needed someone with a Doctorate to tell me.) I decided I wanted to go off coffee until the wedding was over and by then I could decide if I wanted to start drinking it again.
I figured I just loved coffee, but didn't NEED coffee. I quickly discovered I was wrong after a few days with severe headaches and fatigue. I made it 2 weeks and then the thought of sitting through a 3 hour class being lectured seemed like too much to handle without coffee! I got an iced mocha. It was amazing. I made up my mind that I wasn't going to completely give up, it was just a treat and I wanted to continue to go without. Well today I got another coffee, it's almost a week since my last one.
If I have control over anything it's what I put in my body and how I take care of it. I choose to eat healthy or not, I choose to drink coffee or not and I choose to go running or not. There are some things in life that are beyond my control (as much as I hate to admit) and this isn't one of them. If I choose to drink coffee then it's my decision. I guess what I'm getting at is if I want coffee once a week or every two weeks then I can, if that's what I want. Maybe I'm typing in a moment of weakness, but I just love coffee. It makes me happy.
Did I mention I'm back to being vegan? :-)
-Elise

Our first baby!

We want to officially welcome our sweet Betty to the world! Sam and I got a scooter yesterday after a month of working up to it. We were lucky enough to have our second engagement photo shoot on the same day so we have some cute pictures on her. You will notice we don't have helmets on and that won't be happening again, but we stayed on our small block and I was freaking out. Sam is a natural, but it will take me a little more work. Needless to say I'm terrified.

We're pretty hardcore.

Wedding planning is going well but I do wish we had more done. I've had a brief break between semesters but will be back to school full-time on Monday. 87 days and although we are extremely excited we need the time to plan.

I also wanted to mention what an incredible fiancee I have. She will be turning 25 on Saturday and I cannot believe I celebrated her 19th birthday with her! Time really does fly by and I'm thankful for the time we've shared together. Sam is my favorite person and I feel so lucky to be sharing this wonderful time in our life together. I love you babe!

Did I mention she's smokin?

First Shower!

Last week, Elise and I were thrown our very first wedding shower! Her work friends threw it for us and it was super cute and fun, we appreciated it so much. We got lots of very nice gifts, there was amazing food and an adorable and tasty cake. It was weird to have the attention all on us, but so nice to have people supporting us, even if they don't necessarily agree with our relationship, they were showering us with love and helping us celebrate anyway. Such a great feeling, we are lucky to have such awesome friends.

Thank you, thank you, everyone who was involved with throwing the shower, and all who came!

Goodbyes

I'm not a fan of goodbyes...and I have 3 major ones coming up in less than 4 days. The first one being my older sister who also happens to be one of my very favorite people. Growing up, I took "following in her footsteps" to a whole new level. When I was in elementary school I wanted to be Katie so bad, when I walked behind her I would literally try to step where she stepped. I thought it would bring me good luck. Katie thinks she's pretty tough and in a lot of ways she is, (like taping up her bloody nose at her indoor soccer game so they would let her play) but she is so kind. Katie is a very caring person, especially when it comes to our family. When I was in...I believe 9th grade she was planning on taking me to a Janet Jackson concert for my birthday. Shortly before the concert she got really sick and told me we wouldn't be able to go. I was extremely upset but tried to hide it. I went to sleep the night before my birthday and woke up to my room completely covered in streamers and a happy birthday sign. I'm sure she did something else for me too, but that meant the world. Katie is stubborn, hilarious and lives up to every meaning of what a sister should be. She loves me unconditionally, and I've NEVER questioned that. I'm sure going to miss her.

I have spent every possible moment with my twins this week. We have laughed so hard and had so much fun together. They keep saying things like, "You're coming in August right?" I can't decide if I'm more excited for my own wedding or to see them again. I cannot believe my little buddies are the same ones Katie and Kole brought home from the hospital 3 1/2 years ago. Time has gone so quickly and they have grown up so fast. I'm so bummed I won't be able to see them grow over the next few years. When I was hanging out with them last Sunday and reading stories to them before bedtime - Lincoln climbed on my lap, wrapped his little arms around my neck and attacked my face with kisses. I tried to pretend like it was torturous but I'm pretty sure it melted off a piece of my heart. Bells has constantly been wanting me to hold her and get up on my shoulders. Frankie and I feel so lucky as Bella has offered to buy us plane tickets to move to Hawaii with them.

I can't begin to explain how much my heart breaks at the thought of the Sorenson family moving across the ocean. It was only a few weeks ago that I was hugging Kole goodbye and choking out an "I love you." Now you're telling me I have to do 3 more of these?! I guess technically 4, since the next time I see them they'll have a baby girl. I know you wouldn't know it, but I am excited for you guys. I think I'll miss you more than anyone else and probably cry a lot, but I cannot wait to see you in August! Enjoy beautiful Kauai but don't forget about me at home.

I love you guys!

The Story...

I've had many requests on Facebook to hear how Sam proposed. We've been engaged for 8 days now so I suppose it's time to share. First, let me start by saying my fiancee (hee hee) is one of the most sentimental and thoughtful people I know. She had been working on this proposal for over 3 months. And of course she went Sam style with an amazing video that took more work than I could ever imagine.

We started Christmas Eve Day volunteering at West High. (Note to anyone wanting to volunteer on that day, the only place Sam could find was run by an awesome Jewish organization called National Council of Jewish Women. Everyone else has already started celebrating.) After a few hours of volunteering, she took me to one of my very favorite restaurants, which happens to be one she doesn't like. Red Iguana. If you haven't been there take my word for it and not Sam's. It's mind blowing. After enjoying my spicy Mexican food, we headed home. Apparently Taylor and Kenna hadn't finished setting up, so we had to busy ourselves for an hour. We headed out to Layton to exchange Christmas gifts with my parents.

When we finally arrived back home, it took Sam at least 15 minutes to do whatever she was doing. This is probably the most difficult part of our relationship. I am incredibly impatient and she is ridiculously slow. Once she was ready and we had dished up our ice cream she took me into the living room. Taylor and Kenna had set up pillows, blankets and white Christmas lights in our living room. We made ourselves comfortable and she pressed play. It was a DVD full of couples' advice from a few of our friends. There were a few I hadn't seen in quite some time. In-between couples talking, she put little clips of herself telling me things she loved about me. At the end she posted some videos of us - ranging from 6 years ago to present. That was my favorite part. I loved watching the videos with music playing over it. Like my roomies said, it was like a chick flick.

When the movie ended, she pulled out the ring and said some words that are now jumbled in my memory, but something about being her wife. Of course I said yes, but it was more like an excited, "Yes, yes, yes!"

I am so lucky. Sam is my favorite person. She is the love of my life. When I was in the shower this morning she came into the bathroom and said the cutest thing. She said a lifetime isn't long enough for us. It feels so true. Hopefully we'll be reincarnated and find each other again. I'm hoping to be a fish or something in the ocean so she'll have to look for me there.

Now if I can only keep my head on straight to go to work full time, go to school full time and plan a wedding all at the same time, we'll be good. We have already had such an outpouring of love and support from so many friends. Thanks for your help in this wedding planning process. We love you all! Mark your calendars for August 4th, 2012!

Amen.

I know this has been posted all over Facebook, but I love it.

http://front.moveon.org/two-lesbians-raised-a-baby-and-this-is-what-they-got/#.TtaMf0QVakb

Nothing really left to say except, Sam and I are going to be amazing parents.

Thank you Zach Wahls.

In A Round-About Way, This Is For Thanksgiving.

I wish I could explain how or why it is so exciting to meet other people who are gay. It's like...I finally discovered this trait in myself that I believe I always carried but never understood. It's a trait that many despise or fear, but I have come to appreciate; and to meet other people who can relate to me in that way is kind of amazing. I love hearing their stories and how various people in their lives reacted to their coming out. It makes me look at my own life in a new light.

We all have history, and we all create our future in a way that best serves ourselves. I hope all the people who cringe at the gay community come to realize very soon that we are merely fellow human beings who want goodness and equality in the world.

What else is there to see in us?

I am beyond grateful this Thanksgiving season for every single individual I have met who learned I was gay and cared no more about it than that I am blonde. And for the many people in my life who do care, I am grateful that you still love me for me, and that you treat my other half with kindness and respect. I am grateful I never had to experience being thrown out or shunned by my family, and I am grateful for Elise's family who have all given me so much.

So many never experience it, but I am a fortunate person, to have found true love. So Elise, by saying how grateful I am to have discovered this piece of myself (in being gay), I suppose it all comes down to how immensely thankful I am...for you. Always.

-Sam