I went to church today.
It's always interesting to attend church when it was all you knew your entire life and now it's just somewhere I go to hear a family member speak, sing or like today, a baby blessing.
As most people know Sam has a very strong testimony of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day-Saints and I do not. It's hard for me to sit still in my pew and listen to things that are said. I strongly disagree with a lot of things that are said and I think people are oblivious to what they are saying and who it's affecting. I am reminded each time why I no longer attend church.
Half way through testimony meeting I leaned over to Sam and said, "Now it's your turn." She responded with, "I actually thought about it." I would have LOVED for Sam to go up and share her testimony with the members of the congregation, my family specifically. Someone who has every reason to disagree with the church, yet still loves it and supports it. While I stir uncomfortably in my seat, Sam experiences feelings of peace and love.
I have a lot to learn from Sam. Not that I should agree or believe what she does, but to relax. I was in the position of so many of the people in the chapel today for over 20 years. How can I be so quick to get offended and be angry at people who are living what they believe?
If I can't soften my heart and try to come to a place of understanding and love, then going to church isn't a place for me. So, since I would hate to miss out on separating my two nieces during sacrament because they have a case of the giggles, or winking back and forth at my nephews, I better change something. The church isn't going to be changing so I might as well. I know what members believe and I know what's going to be said before I enter those doors. Therefore, it's my choice to go and take a seat.
I am thankful for the life experiences I have had and that my mind has been opened. I have been able to have a better understanding of so many people I used to fear. I love the people in my life from every end of the spectrum.